I would like to be here today with my hubby!

Again I woke up too early.  well, yesterday I didn't wake up on my own, it was due to the phone ringing.  Today, I haven't got a clue as to what woke me up.  But it isn't all bad, I did my morning routine, and I did my WT, yesterday I just couldn't handle studying.  So I did that this morning and wow... the WT lesson.  I burst into tears when I paragraph 5... what a privilege it is to have Jehovah's name.  He loves us so much that he wants us to have his name.  Even though it didn't mention it in the lesson, my thought was, how vital it is to make sure we mind our conduct and all we do so we remain worthy of his great name!  I just feel so unworthy, yet very honored.

Every day my digestive issues just... i just get tired of it sometimes.  Last night and this morning, are just leaving me wiped out!  I am sipping ginger ale this morning just to calm things down. I can't go anywhere cause I have to stay next to the bathroom.  At least I am getting some walking in today...haha.

Speaking of walking, I really miss my treadmill & elliptical.  We just don't have the room in the house for them anymore... well, we could put one in our bedroom, but EO just don't like having that in there.  I really need it though.  I have been debating, on which one to bring in.  The elliptical helps me so I can climb stairs and strengthens me more, but on tough days, I can't hardly do it.  The treadmill at least keeps me moving even though nothing else is being strengthened.  I can do that on my bad days...(just not on bed ridden days).  I think because I seem to be having more bad days than anything, I should put the treadmill in our bedroom, cause at least I can get moving again.  I just have to convince the hubby to let me have it in there.  By this fall when Colton & Steph move we will have plenty of room for them again.

So for the party, Colton and Steph have some friends coming up from the twin cities.  I really wish some of our family could be there so they could meet their friends.  I think this will be the only opportunity they would have to meet them.  Because once Colton & Steph move, I just don't know how often they and their friends will be around.  But oh well, what can you do.  I am still really happy that B&C are going away for their anniversary.  50 years and never being able to go away together on their anniversary... it is about time!  Not that they haven't tried.  They have made plans so many times, but one thing or another came up and prevented them from going.  So they are way over due and I think it's wonderful.  EO does too, he saw how upset his mom was when time and again others prevented them from going.  So they get to go now and I couldn't be happier for them.

Today's talk... Bro Dan did such a wonderful job.  I sure appreciate all the encouragement to keep drawing closer to Jehovah, to remember all the ways He supports and teaches us.  And just how much He loves us. He loves us enough to remind us the truth about death.  Then when Dan talked about his mom... I just lost it.  All the people have lost so many over the years.  Too many friends and family....way to many.  But we will get them back.... the world says death is natural... there is nothing natural about it, that is why it hurts those who have lost loved ones so deeply. 

I can't stop the tears today.  It has been a rough week, and I am so so so so drained.  And I feel yet another fever about to begin.  Most likely the strain of the whole week and adding yet another fever, is most likely the reason why I can't keep a grip on the tears.  Once the fever is full force, I am sure the tears will stop.  Oh well, bad days, everyone has them.

P.S.... the mass on my jaw is growing again.  It has been for awhile and it is starting to push my jaw over now.